| http://www.washingtonpost.com/ac2/wp-dyn/admin/article/largerphoto?showSky=true&imgId=I1903-2004Oct01&nav=hcmodule
http://www.thatwasme.net/
I found both of those to be quite amusing.
The Red Sox are going to the World Series! Yay! Although, to be quite honest, I care much less about what happens in the Series than the fact that the Red Sox beat the Yankees last night. That was pretty awesome.
My boss took me out to lunch today. It was really cute. I enjoy him a lot, he's a neat guy. He invited me to go to a Halloween party at his house next weekend, and a holiday party, come the holidays. I actually have semi-plans the night of his Halloween party, but now I feel like I want to go to his thing, just because he invited me and he's my boss. Its in Baltimore, however.
Tonight I'm going to a bar with Miss Emily to watch the Astros and the Cardinals play their game 7. I don't really know either of those teams well so I'm not all pumped like I was last night. But chances are I'll get into it after a couple beers are in my system. | comments: Leave a comment   |
| | Current Music: | norah jones | | Subject: | hahaha | | Time: | 11:32 pm | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/amused.gif) amused |
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| 
Jesus thinks you're a selfish bitch. All you do is
shop, eat, and bitch. Jesus is not asking you
to join the Peace Corps or anything, He just
thinks you should stop being such a twat and
look out for your fellow man a bit.
What does Jesus think of you?
brought to you by Quizilla
are you proud erin? i'm smoking parliaments and jesus thinks i am a selfish bitch too. | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Liz Phair | | Time: | 09:16 am | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/relaxed.gif) satisfied |
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| | I think I'm going to go see a movie by myself. I don't have to work today, because of course, nothing ever goes the way its supposed to. Hopefully I'm going to start working, for real finally, tomorrow at 8:30. None of my Alexandria friends are around or available, and I have nothing to do this afternoon... so I think I'm going to go to a movie alone. A few years ago that would have been completely out of the question for me. So I'm pretty proud of myself for this little bout of confidence. I've found myself becoming more secure with myself, bit by bit, over the past year. I've really wanted to see Garden State for awhile now, and its playing at Shirlington, which is a neat little theater pretty close by. Tonight I'm babysitting for a really cute little girl. I really can't remember the last time I've babysat. I don't really know what I'm supposed to do with a one and a half year old kid. All in all, today is a good day. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| a friend of mine, eric, just found out he's getting deployed to iraq. he thinks its going to happen in the very near future. his aim profile right now says:
"If you can't respect that your whole perspective is whack,
maybe you'll love me when I fade to black."
it just occurred to me that that quote has been in his profile only for the past week or so. i wonder if it has something to do with the bush administration. most military people i know are gung-ho george bush, so it would kind of make me feel better to know that there are some of them out there that aren't in favor of the bush administration. although it still sucks that eric is going away.
in regards to my previous post, i.e. nick at nite, i have a comment about roseanne. the kid that plays d.j. connor. he was on the tv show for something like 10 years, and he still never learned how to act. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| 1. Uncle Jesse is a very good father figure. Michelle Tanner was so freaking cute when she was a little little kid. I wonder if the Olsen Twins are embarrassed to watch the old Full House episodes. Danny, Stephanie, and DJ Tanner, along with Joey, are so freaking cheesy they make me want to puke.
2. Sometimes Dave reminds me a lot of Ryan. I worry about that. I think its ok though, being that Dave and I have a completely platonic relationship.
3. Last night was my 5 year highschool reunion. It was weird. Surprisingly, there were ALOT of people there, probably at least 40-50 people I graduated with. Some of them have changed a lot, some of them are exactly the same. I only talked to about 6 for an extended period of time.
4. I finally got a pseudo-job. Its a temp job within the temp agency I was working with. I'm going to be an assistant to the guy who works with government contracts. So far, he seems like a very cool guy. However, I have to work at my OTHER temp job until they find someone to replace me. For that job, I'm an operator for the FDIC. Its cool, because I have a security clearance ID tag that I wear around my neck, so I feel kind of special. Its not cool, because all I do is answer phones all day, but my phone only rings about once every half hour. There's only so much I can do on the Internet for the rest of the time. At least its easy.
5. Infinitecat.com is probably the most disturbing, but strangely fascinating, website I've ever seen in my life.
6. Why is it that the only guys who ever show any interest in me, of late, are the sort of sketchy/weird guys?
That is all. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | In the past few days I've lost a full pack of cigarettes (minus one) and two lighters, which I never bring with me when I go out, mind you, for fear of losing them. A few minutes ago I put on the hoodie that I pretty much wear exclusively at nighttime when I go outside to smoke a cigarette, and what did I find in the pockets? A full pack of cigarettes (minus one) and two lighters. Score. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| so... i kind of hate surveys. but i'm drunk and awake and bored right now so i'm going to fill this one out.
First Name? elizabeth
Are you named after anyone? not that i know of
Do you wish on stars? only shooting stars.. which i've seen only once in my life, on my 20th birthday.
Which finger is your favorite? index finger... i don't know why
When did you last cry? last night.. I'm pretty much a basket-case most of the time
Do you like your handwriting? sometimes
What is your favorite lunch meat? well, i'm eating a "cheesy" hot dog right now.
What is your most embarrassing CD on the shelf? At this exact moment in time, i don't have any embarrassing CDs on my shelf in my apartment.
Are you a daredevil? eh... probably not
Do fish have feelings? no. but cats and dogs do.
Are you trendy? well.. probably not
How do you release anger? not very productively.. i keep it built up for quite awhile and then i end up getting angry about stupid shit.. and often don't even talk about why i'm really mad.
Where is your second home? well.. my dad's house is probably "home." i guess that would mean my apartment is my second home.
Do you trust others easily? males.. no. females.. usually.
What were your favorite toys as a child? my dollhouse, barbie, my little ponies
What class in school do you think is totally useless? GSCI 101 - i think my exam scores averaged 40% or so... yet i got a B in the class.. on that lovely curve.
Do you use sarcasm a lot? some.. not a lot.
Have you ever been in a mosh pit? yes
What do you look for in a guy/girl? well physical attraction definitely plays a part.. nice eyes are good.. and then a large portion is whether they can make me laugh.. another large part is how they treat other people, especially my friends
Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? usually not
Do you think that you are strong? emotionally.. so-so. physically.. i'm stronger than one would think.
What's your favorite Ice Cream Flavor? i almost always buy neopolitan at the grocery store.. which i realize is 3 different flavors. at ben & jerrys i usually get phish food or chocolate chip cookie dough.
What is your least favorite food? tuna fish or pickles
Are you in love with anyone? no
How many people have a crush on you right now? none to my knowledge
Who do you miss most right now? my mom
Do you want everyone who reads this to fill it out, too? well i predict about two people are going to read this.. and i won't burden them with surveys | | comments: Leave a comment |
| I am so tired of this job searching stuff. I don't think there's a lot more discouraging than looking for a job. All you ever hear is bad news, until the very end.
I was supposed to go grocery shopping today. But there are these guys sitting outside my building, on the bench right outside my window. I've never seen them before and they have been there for a really long time, not doing anything. I'm scared that they're waiting for me to leave so they can break into my apartment and rob me. So I'm not going grocery shopping until they leave. Paranoid much?
I've been telling myself all day long that I'm not going to go out tonight. I've been going out enough the past few weeks and it is really unnecessary. Also, my horoscope told me today to be very careful with my money. However, my friend Brooke just called and wants to get a cocktail when she gets off work. I haven't seen or talked to Brooke since like June probably, and we used to be pretty close, so I want to meet up with her and catch up. My good intentions are foiled again. | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| I had a dream last night that I used to be on Full House when I was little. I played Michelle. I think its because Erin sometimes tells me that when I was a little kid, I looked kind of like Michelle Tanner when she was little. (I wish I looked like the Olsen twins now.) In my dream I was broke, which is actually true to life, but I realized I used to be on Full House and I couldn't figure out why I was broke now.
Dave and Pancho (the extremely nice bouncer from Dave's bar) came over to my apartment last night at like 3am. I was awake and sort of drunk because I had been out drinking earlier (go figure). I'm pretty sure they came over because Dave knew I was mad at him and we talked for like half an hour about the whole shot situation the night before and it was all stupid and unnecessary drama. Then we stayed up until like 5 something (after Pancho left) talking about alot of other shit so I guess everything's cool now. Its been a long time since we've really talked. The truth is I stopped being angry the second I saw him and Pancho at my door. I'm such a pushover. I can't stay mad at people, especially guys (which is a very dangerous trait to have), and Dave in particular. I'm pretty sure this general quality could prove to be very detrimental. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| Setting: The Bayou Room, where Dave is bartending. Friday night around midnight. The bar is semi-crowded, but nothing the two bartenders can't handle easily. Liz enters with several friends and goes up to the bar to get shots for everyone.
Liz: Hey Dave, whats up? Are you ok?
Dave: No.
Liz: Alright.. Well I'm sorry... Um, well we just want to get some shots. Can I have one Tuaca, one tequila, and two melonballs?
Dave looks behind him, then says: We're out of Tuaca.
Liz: Ok then, three melonballs and one tequila.
Dave starts making shots, then: You'll get four melonballs. Fuck the tequila.
Liz: Um..
Dave walks away. One of Liz's friends comes over and Liz explains what happened. Corinne says: Well I'm going to talk to him, Emily won't take a melonball, she wants a tequila.
Liz: Well.. he just seems to be in a really bad mood, I don't want you guys to argue or anything. Come on, lets just go somewhere else.
Corinne: No, what he did was not ok.. I won't be mean but I want to talk to him.
Liz walks away, and the conversation between Corinne and Dave proceeds as so:
Corinne: Hey Dave, um, Liz didn't order four melonballs, she wanted two melonballs, one Tuaca, and one tequila.
Dave: I'm out of Tuaca and I don't give a fuck about tequila.
Dave walks away.
As of 3:00pm the following day, Liz has not heard a word from Dave, nor does she expect to. Liz decides Dave does not need to be considered her friend anymore, and Liz plans to never enter the Bayou Room again if she can help it. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | ani d | | Subject: | i hate drama | | Time: | 07:14 pm | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/angry.gif) aggravated |
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| I thought that the drama would be over after high school. Then I thought that it would definitely be over by the time I got out of college. Apparently I was sadly mistaken. Ever since I started hanging out with Brian, which was only like 2 months ago, there's been so much 'he said, she said' drama in my life and it makes me want to scream. Everything was going well before that happened... I was really tight with Dave and with Erica, I hated my job but whatever, and in general, as far as I remember, I was pretty satisfied with life. I'm sure I could scroll back in my livejournal a few months and find out otherwise... but for all intents and purposes, I was generally happy. Enter Brian. We did have fun together and sometimes he can be a really cool guy. But he's very close-minded and can be quite condescending, though he usually says he's just kidding around. The condescending thing rubs off on Dave too, so it sometimes feels like they're ganging up on me. And Brian definitely has some major anger problems, usually when he's drunk but sometimes when he's sober. He does some really stupid and/or fucked up things, and it always comes on totally randomly, then he like storms out of wherever he is, and acts like nothing happened afterwards. We bicker more than I've ever bickered with anyone else, at least after only a 2 month period. I would say that about fifty percent of the times we've hung out, at least one of us would go home angry or frustrated with the other. He did have a crush on me, which he told me several times, and every time I told him that I enjoy his company but I don't like him in that way. He always acts like he understands and everything's cool, then he tells me again that he has feelings. He always says that we have so much fun together and get along so well (really?) and he doesn't understand how I could act that way without liking him, and implies that I'm leading him on and that I always lead guys on. A couple weeks ago we had a long talk about it, we were both drunk, and he said all these really sweet things to me about how I'm the only thing that makes him happy right now blah blah blah. I'm an attention whore, so in my drunken state I kissed him, which was obviously a big mistake, stupid stupid stupid of me, and was indeed leading him on. I'm scared that if I hadn't done that, everything would be normal and fine right now. Anyway, we hung out the next night and he was definitely acting like we were dating, whereas I was paying more attention to the other people we were with, which I know made him angry. The night after that we hung out again, with Dave and Corinne, and the night ended with Dave and Brian storming out of my house, telling us we were lame and had no personality. I got home and there was an im from Brian on my computer, basically telling me that he "knows how I am" and he can't talk to me or have contact with me anymore, nor can he talk to Dave, and could I please "tell Dave that they can't talk anymore," and he hopes I have a nice life and get everything I need. What? How old is he? And he blocked me from his buddy list for a few days. My favorite part of the whole thing is that he wanted me to tell Dave that they couldn't talk anymore. Who does that? I didn't tell Dave a thing, and I actually didn't talk to Brian or Dave the whole week, and I didn't really care that much. They're still best buddies, so I don't know why Brian even said that. I ended up seeing Dave Friday and Saturday nights and it was sort of like nothing had happened, which is fine because I realized I sort of missed having Dave around. I also saw Erica those nights and she was being pretty cold to me... I don't know whats up with that; we were super close for awhile there, at least I thought, and again, when Brian entered the picture she turned on me on a dime. It was like the three of them formed a little clique and I was definitely not a part. It kind of used to be like Dave, Erica, and I were a little clique and now I'm jealous.. which I know is not cool but its the truth. Anyway, since Brian "couldn't have contact" with me anymore, that was definitely the topper of me being ousted from that little group. So earlier today, Brian im'd me and definitely was acting like nothing had happened. Didn't mention a word about what happened last weekend. He made a lot of small talk, called me "hun," and complained to me/sought my input about his job and about some other problems he's having, then he asked if I wanted to see a movie tonight. WHAT? I was really cold to him the whole time we talked, and I declined on the movie, but I don't think he really got the picture. After the conversation I was thinking about iming him back and telling him that things aren't really cool between us, in fact, and I'm not a fan of all this shit (but more articulately than that). Then I thought maybe I should leave it alone and sort of just back off and hope that he gets the picture. I still can't decide. I know that if I im him and tell him that stuff its going to get back to Dave and Erica and I'll look like an idiot, and it will probably be the end of our friendships altogether. I am so sick of this back and forth stuff, of having to worry about what Dave and Erica think of me, and of feeling unwanted around 2 of my former closest friends. I'm thinking that the best solution would be to try to put all three of them out of my life. I'm thinking thats the only way I'll really be able to stop worrying and stop caring. But I'm not sure that I'm up for that... not only because I miss what we used to have (with Dave and Erica, at least) but because we have a lot of the same friends and hang out at the same places, so I would have to make some major changes in order for that plan to work. This is so frustrating and so unnecessary.
PS There are so many "moods" to choose from when you're posting a thing in livejournal, and I never feel like scrolling through the whole thing (it requires a lot of thought), so I think that I almost always end up picking one from the very top. | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| Erin's recent post put me in thinking-about-ex-boyfriends mode. So I decided to write about it. Lucky you.
My relationship with Ryan was by far the best and the worst relationship I've ever had with a guy. He is an incredibly cool guy with a horrible fucked up and mean streak. We both have bad tempers (although mine seems to come out mainly when dealing with guys) and we are both stubborn, so when we bickered, it always turned into a much bigger thing than it should have been. And its almost impossible to win an argument with him... He is quite good at justifying his every action. We got into a lot of trouble together, and it was often not the good, fun kind of trouble. He continuously let me down, in so many ways. I gave him so much, but he also took so much from me, usually with very little reciprocation. He is completely unstable and irresponsible, and usually pretty unreliable, in terms of being there emotionally. He is also completely unpredictable (which is actually the perfect word to describe him). The unpredictability could definitely be a good thing sometimes, but I never got over a nagging, lingering feeling of having to wonder if he was going to be there the next day. He drinks and uses drugs way too much, which causes him to do very stupid things, the extent of which I can't even get into here.
But he is like a drug himself. He could bring me so far down, but he could also bring me so high up. And to me, at least, being around him was addictive, to the point that I ended up doing incredibly stupid things myself.
When we were getting along, we had so much fun together. We could spend days on end together, which we did from time to time, and not get sick of each other. We laughed hysterically at all the same silly, ridiculous things, and we could make each other laugh like no other. Even recently, after our relationship was 100% over and we hadn't seen or spoken to each other in many months, when we did see each other again we ended up taking a long road trip and laughed the entire time. We enjoyed doing the same things, for the most part, so we were rarely bored. Going out, drinking together, we were superb; some of my most fun times have taken place when Ryan and I were out drinking together. His family was the greatest; they invited me to Thanksgiving dinner sometimes and Christmas/Christmas Eve dinners, as well as just inviting me out with them from time to time. They sent me a card when my mother died, and they came with Ryan to the wake and the funeral. Ryan was sitting right beside me when I found out that my mother died, and he was wonderful, both that night and the following weeks when I was home. I loved his friends, and for the most part, I think most of my friends liked him a lot too. When he was staying with me down at JMU, my roommates generally had a lot of fun with him, I think. He is probably the luckiest person I've ever met, which isn't necessarily good or bad, but its unbelievable how much shit he has gotten out of by pure luck. He is smart and always has an interesting story to tell. When we were getting along, which was rare toward the end, but in any case, when we were getting along, he treated me really well, I liked who I was when I was around him, and I could honestly say he was one of my best friends. But only when we were getting along. When we weren't getting along, I really, really did not like who I was when I was around him.
I'm sure it can't be good for my well-being to think about and list all the good things about Ryan. With time, a lot of the bad gets erased from my memory and only the good things stay. Which is fairly awesome, in the long run. But its so easy to miss him sometimes, because we really did have such a blast together and he was such a good friend to me.. sometimes. I hardly ever catch myself missing the guy I dated for a long time prior to Ryan... so maybe all I need is a few more years, then this will all be out of my system. In all honesty though, the bad stuff in our relationship outweighed the good, and I have to remember that. I always ended up giving him second, third, fourth chances and it always ended up backfiring in my face. In the end, all the fun times and laughter are not worth all the grief he put me through. I think that, for me, its healthier to have a general, long-term (but maybe sometimes low-grade), sense of happiness and contentment than the insane ups and downs I had with Ryan. | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| | Subject: | yikes | | Time: | 06:44 pm |
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| | I just stepped out of the shower and there were definitely like 3 people standing right outside the window in my bathroom, probably about 8 feet away from where I was. I guess they were trying to get down to the basement. Luckily the shutters on my window were closed, but still.. it was pretty scary to step out of the shower and hear random people's voices in very close proximity. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | tori | | Time: | 11:45 pm | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/sad.gif) lonely |
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| | I need something. I'm not sure what. But my life feels, has felt for the past few days or weeks or months, somewhat incomplete. Maybe its just a job that I need. Most likely. Something to do with my days other than sleep. But it doesn't seem that easy. I think that I need a better network of friends. I'm so used to having my best friends all around me; this has been the case since I was a little kid, for as long as I can remember. Suddenly everyone graduates from college, everyone goes their separate ways, and the only people around me are acquaintences, friendly acquaintences for sure, but still, not people that I can run to anytime I have a problem or anytime that I'm just lonely and need a friend or a hug. I have many a drinking buddy up here, but that pretty much covers it. Ugh. Or maybe I'm just feeling sorry for myself, as I often do, and expressing my self-pitying feelings through livejournal, as I often do. That is probably the case, and I am confident that when I wake up tomorrow morning I will feel a million times better. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | lisa loeb - stay | | Subject: | old tv shows | | Time: | 11:59 am | | Current Mood: | ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/okay.gif) blah |
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| Its funny how, at least among the people that I talk to, whenever the topic of conversation is old TV shows, namely Full House and Saved by the Bell, the majority of the people immediately remember two episodes: 1. The Full House when DJ goes on a crash diet because she wants to be skinny for Kimmy's pool party, and 2. The Saved by the Bell when Jesse gets addicted to caffeine pills. ("I'm so excited, I'm so excited, I'm so.... scared, sob sob sob.") I saw the above-mentioned Full House last night when I was trying to go to sleep. It seems like I see that episode more often than I see other episodes of the show. Ditto the episode of the Cosby show when its Rudy's b-day party (when she was still really young) and Cliff plays horsie or something with all the little kids on his knee, and the adorable little fat boy almost falls off Cliff's leg. I woke up thinking about these things. I must have a pretty boring life.
So I was sick last night. I was at a bar and I had finished about half of my beer, definitely no more than that, and I was standing there talking to Erica. I said something about being hot, as we were in a small space filled with a bunch of people, and she was like "yeah, you're sweating bullets, do you feel alright?" I don't know if I answered her or not, but the next thing I remember I was on the floor and all the people around me were very concerned. Then I went into the bathroom and threw up. I've never fainted before, it was quite scary. It was even worse that this happened in a bar, because I was sure everyone just thought I was wasted and passing out, which it certainly looked like. Luckily I knew the bartenders and the bouncer guy and even the manager, and I guess they all knew that I hadn't really had anything to drink. Of course, I couldn't think that rationally last night, and started crying because I was sure everyone thought I was a total jackass, so either way I made a complete fool of myself. When I got home I called my dad and cried to him for like half an hour, after which I felt a bit better, but I hate it when I do shit like that. I always act in the moment, make a big deal out of everything, and its always totally irrational. So I'm embarrassed the next morning or whenever I start thinking rationally again, and I don't want to face these people. I need to learn how to get a better perspective on things in the moment. I need to stop freaking out about every little thing. It was pretty scary though, last night. It was just the worst setting I could have picked for something like that to happen. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| I'm modifying the entry I wrote last night because I was under the influence of beer last night.
I went out to get a couple drinks with Dave and this guy named James, who is a friendly acquaintance, I guess you could say. We've hung out maybe 5 times, all of which when we both happened to be drinking down at Dave's bar. He's a cool guy to talk to sometimes, but probably not someone I would want to be good friends with. So last night, after Dave left, it was just James and me hanging out at Portners, and James, who was more than a little drunk, kept talking about how he "very much liked me" and "very much liked Dave" and "very much liked Harry," and blah blah blah, just being really friendly and cool. Then all of a sudden he starts talking about how he thinks I'm dangerous, which sort of caught me off guard. He said that whenever he's around me, its like this alert goes off in the back of his mind that tells him danger, danger. I didn't really know how to respond to that, so I said something about how intuitive feelings like that are generally correct and I usually listen to mine. He agreed with that, saying he has a pretty good intuition too. He kept asking me why I'm dangerous and why he's getting these feelings, to which I had no answer.
No one has ever told me that I seem "dangerous" before, so now I'm curious as to what kind of vibes I'm putting off. I don't really care what James thinks of me, and I don't really care if people DO think I'm dangerous, but I'd like to know what it is about me that makes them think that.
I woke up at like 7:30 this morning for no reason at all and couldn't get back to sleep. I often hate it when that happens, but sometimes I like it because I don't sleep the day away and I feel really productive. This morning I got my car inspected, which I have to do in July and completely forgot about until yesterday. Now I think I will look for jobs. I really need a job. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| I don't think I have much interest in going to my five-year highschool reunion. Unfortunately, one of the girls who is in charge of the whole thing is a friend of mine, and she has complete access to my im name, email address, mailing address, and phone number. And she's persistent. So I have a feeling I may have to go just to make my life easier.
I've been thinking about birthdays. I don't think I like them. This is a relatively new phenomenom for me, I think its only been a couple years that I haven't liked them. Its like, there's this expectation that you have to have fun on your birthday. And if you don't, it seems like its way more of a big deal than if you don't have fun on some random day. I'm kind of dreading my birthday this year. I guess theoretically it could be fun if people remember and I go out and have a good time (i.e. my 21st birthday was a blast) but not many people know when the stupid day is and I don't have any money anyway to go out with. Plus I always kind of think that my friends feel like they have this obligation to go out with me, even if they don't want to. And thats not ok.
I just had the ultimate blonde moment. I was leaving someone a voicemail with my email address, and I was like "d as is dog, o, u, g as in.... g as in.... well g," etc., etc. I'm losing brain cells by the second being out of school. | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| I had a dream last night that I met a guy who was really good-looking, sweet and kind, sane, and interested in me. And I was interested in him too. As much as I say I don't want a boyfriend, it was very comforting. But I still don't think I want a boyfriend.
I wonder if all my work friends went to brunch this morning without me. Last weekend we were planning on going to brunch this morning, but I didn't hear anything from any of them last night or this morning. Hmm. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| I'm not going to spend another DIME until I get a job. Seriously, I don't know why I'm such an asshole and decided to spend almost every cent of my money without even any job prospects, when I also have real things like rent and bills to pay. I have five dollars in my wallet right now, and one dollar in my kitchen drawer. That is all I'm going to spend until I get a job. I think I will spend it on milk and water. No ATM machine, no using my check card, no writing checks, no grocery shopping, no going out drinking or for dinner, no nothing at all until I start making money. Except rent and bills. Seriously. Whats wrong with me? I've never been this low on money before, especially considering that I got a good chunk of money when I graduated and I actually made decent money at my old restaurant. I'm such an asshole.
I've been sending out my resume at least. One place called me this morning, but then she said they would probably get back to me later this afternoon if they wanted to schedule a face-to-face interview, and they never got back to me. I may call tomorrow morning. I guess you could say I'm semi-moving along.
And I think that alot of my friends are unhappy with me. Not all of them. But I've had no motivation to go out for the past few days, for one because I don't want to spend any money, for two because I don't really like it when people pay for me, and for three because I always act like an ass in front of my friends because I always get drunk, and then I feel bad and don't want to hang out with them, mainly because I'm sure they think I'm an ass. Its sort of a vicious circle. Maybe I should stop getting so fucking drunk. There's an idea. Hopefully when I get a real job I'll have some motivation to stop drinking all the damn time. Working in a restaurant, or not working at all, are not situations that are very conducive with staying sober.
I'm very much afraid that my air-conditioner is going to fall out of my window. Did I say that last time? The window is kind of stuck so I can't get it to go down quite all the way on one side of the AC, and I feel like its very slowly creeping its way out of the window on the other side, until one day its going to SMASH into the ground. I'm like 8 or 10 feet up from the sidewalk, so that would be a pretty nasty smash. Its a very heavy AC. Plus there's a bench directly under that window. People don't normally sit on it, but... Tomorrow I think Erica is going to come over and help me fix the window. Hopefully all I need is another pair of hands.
I know I bitch a lot. I don't like bitching to people when I'm actually hanging out with them, so I figure its better to do it in here. If people get tired of it, its pretty easy to just scroll on down past the entry, is how I justify myself. But don't get me wrong; even though I don't LIKE bitching to people when I'm actually hanging out with them, that certainly doesn't mean I don't do it. I think I just bitch a lot in general.
I think I'm going to start doing arts and crafts with my newfound "staying home all the time" life. Arts and crafts and reading. Maybe I'll start walking down to the river and reading. That would be very hip and intellectual of me I think. Pseudo-intellectual. We'll see. | | comments: Leave a comment |
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